it's funny how sometimes the one thing you need to do and "desire" to do is not actually what you really want. i've wanted to slow down all semester, to catch up. and here i am, head cold and hoarse, and all i want to do is NOT be still. because in this stillness, there is nothing to hide the fears that have been bubbling under the surface. there is nothing to distract me from the doubts that i have. and i don't really like facing these things, yet here is Jesus. holding my hand and saying do not be afraid. I am with you. these things are not going to master you nor are they a deciding factor in your life. trust Me.
and though they are still there, prowling just beyond my heart...i will look to Him. i will fear no evil, remember? i will not be anxious, because He is the sustainer and giver of life, of all good things. i do not have to have it all together. sometimes these truths are harder to believe than their false counterparts.
in some ways, though....i'm glad to be at the end of my rope. i can't really explain why, but i am thankful for that tiny seed of gratitude.
"The truth about it is, whether we is rich or poor or something in between, this earth ain't no final restin place. So in a way, we is all homeless-just workin our way toward home." -Denver Moore, Same Kind of Different as Me